Life After Death?

After our wife passes, many of us will ask the question we desperately want an answer to:

“Does she still exist? Is she still aware of me? Can she hear me or see me? Is there any way for me to communicate with her?”…

Widower Self Help, Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower RelationshipsFred ColbyJanuary 23, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower’s syndrome, What is a widower experiencing?, Death of SpouseComment

Widower Wearing Wedding Ring Sparks Huge Discussion

Have you ever been the one to make everyone in the room suddenly freeze, their puzzled sights pointed in your direction after asking something that seemed completely okay at the time?

When a 32-year-old woman by the username u/Ideal-Mind3099 decided to ask her new colleague “James”, a recent widower, about the wedding band on his finger – things went into an opposite direction from what she expected….

Widower Relationships, Widower Self Help, Widower GriefFred ColbyJanuary 12, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower blogs, Widower syndrome, What is a widower experiencing? Comments

WHAT TO SAY, NOT SAY, AND I SAY …. TO A NEW WIDOWER

I recently was asked during a radio interview to summarize my advice to the friends and family of a widower on what to say or not say to them. The following are some highlights of our conversation…

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyOctober 19, 2021Widower blogs, Widower’s syndrome, Death of Spouse, Widower Families Comments

Dating Lessons

Starting to date again at age 65 after being married for many years is intimidating for both widows and widowers. The reality can be very different than the cliché’s seen at the movies. For me, dating was a necessary step in my journey to redefine myself and regain my self-confidence.

Widowers and dating, Widower Relationships, Widower blogFred ColbySeptember 22, 2021Fred Colby, AuthorWidower blogs, Widower’s syndrome, widower dating behavior Comments

Selling Your House?

After the loss of our wives, many of us face the question, “Should I sell my house?” and the follow-up question, “Where will I go if I sell it?”

You may find, as I did, that the answer to the first is….

Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower Self Help, Widower RelationshipsFred ColbyJuly 15, 2021Fred Colby, AuthorWidower blogs, Widower Health, Widower Self Help, Widower’s syndrome Comments

Peace and Serenity Six Years Later

As I recently sat on the porch swing looking out over the green fields, pond, and river before me I realized just how different things are for me now, compared to six years ago after losing my wife of 45 years…

Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower Grief ExperienceFred ColbyJune 18, 2021Fred Colby, Authorwidower embracing grief, Widower’s syndrome, Widower blogs, Stages of grief Comments

Why Are Some Widowers So Angry?

Shortly after my wife’s death, I went to the mountains by myself for a week and screamed as loud and often as I wanted to. But now, 5 years later, I no longer feel the anger I felt then. I now forget how easy it was to cut myself off from others, and to let the anger and depression take over.

Widower Relationships, Widower Grief, Widower blogFred ColbyApril 6, 2021Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower’s syndrome, widower grief, Widower anger Comments

Should I Move?

Every widower will at some point face the question, “Should I move out of my house?”… There is a sort of push-pull relationship with the home, in which you want to escape it…. But also want to retreat to its familiar arms…

Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower Grief ExperienceFred ColbyMarch 9, 2021Fred Colby, AuthorWidower’s syndrome, widowers asking for help, How a widower can keep their relationships, Widower Families Comments

Widower: Oh Crap! Now What?

That was my reaction when I recently found out that I had prostate cancer and would have to start treatment soon. When you get prostate cancer, suddenly everyone you know is dealing with the same or a similar problem… We widowers seem to be primed to get all kinds of serious illnesses within a year or two of our wives passing.

Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyFebruary 24, 2021Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower’s syndrome, widower grief Comments

Widower: A Message for a Widower’s Friends and Family

A kind word can save a widower. Amazing, but true! When a widower is buried in grief, just one kind word from someone can make their grief bearable and make their chances of surviving their grief intact more likely. More than once a friend called me at just the right time and offered kind words of support, or to meet with me, or to help in some way….

Widower Relationships, Widower Self Help, Widower Grief Experience, Widower blogFred ColbyJanuary 25, 2021Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Families, widowers asking for help, Widower’s syndrome, Blogs for widowersComment

Widower: Pushing Them Away

Have you ever known someone who is so kind, so caring, so considerate and so wanting to please you and everyone around them that they drive you kind-of-crazy? In response, do you bristle, offer abrupt answers to their questions, and/or push them away every time you are around them.

Well, that may be the feeling that you have around everyone after you lose your wife….

Widower Relationships, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJanuary 12, 2021Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower’s syndrome, Widower blogs Comments

Widower: Surviving Self-Isolation

This blog is for all widowers who are struggling with grieving and isolation.

As widowers we often are advised to avoid self-isolation….In normal times we are told to get out, try new activities, meet new people, and reach out to those who still love us and are in our life. All of this is critical to eventual healing.

But now we are often advised to isolate-in-place due to COVID–19.

Widower blog, Widower Gifts, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyDecember 16, 2020Fred Colby, AuthorWidower’s syndrome, widowers asking for help, Stages of grief, Widower therapy Comments

Widower: EMBRACE OR ESCAPE THE HOLIDAYS?

One of my mantras as a widower is: “It will never be the same again!” This is never more obvious than during the holidays. Because holiday memories are so unforgettable and because they are so important to the family as a unit, the loss of your wife just makes these days especially difficult to deal with. COVID 19 has only compounded the problems.

Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower Grief ExperienceFred ColbyNovember 17, 2020Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Families, Widower blogs, widower embracing grief, widower grief Comments

Widower: Maid, Cook, Concubine or Wife?

How do we know that our new friend is the “right one”?

In our messed-up psycho-emotional state it is so easy to make a bad decision and have our feelings dictated by wrong motives. It is easy to think that we want to marry this wonderful new woman we just met. (I know this from personal experience.)

Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbySeptember 22, 2020Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, widower grief, Widower’s syndrome, Grieving, Healing Grief, widower building new relationshipsComment

Widower: Brothers in Grief

We feel so isolated and alone when we begin our grief journey. Not only do we believe no one can understand what we are going through, but we feel unable or unwilling to convey what we are going through to others. Finding our Brothers in Grief often helps widowers to get through this worst of times.

Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower RelationshipsFred ColbyAugust 12, 2020Fred Colby, AuthorWidower blogs, Widower Health, Widow and widower groups near me (how to find), widowers asking for help, Widower behavior Comments

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