IN HER NAME

When our wives pass, we often ask, “How we can remember, honor, and love them going forward?” That is a huge question for many of us. The answer often plays a major role in how we process and heal our grief…

Widower Relationships, Widower Grief Experience, Widower, Widower blogFred ColbyDecember 11, 2023Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, widower embracing grief, Widower syndrome, widower loneliness, Coping with death of wifeComment

We Are Worthy!!

Whether quoting from Wayne’s World or the Bible, the phrase “I am not worthy” may describe how we feel at times after our wives pass away. A ritual of self-condemnation and feelings of inadequacy often overwhelm us, especially when we are alone. It is so easy to fall into a pattern of blaming ourselves or others….

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Relationships, Widower Grief ExperienceFred ColbyNovember 27, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Behavior of a widower, overcoming widower isolation, Widower syndrome, healing griefComment

Why Are Some Widowers So Angry?

Shortly after my wife’s death, I went to the mountains by myself for a week and screamed as loud and often as I wanted to. But now, years later, I no longer feel the anger I felt then. I now forget how easy it was to cut myself off from everyone and to let the anger and depression take over my life.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyNovember 8, 2023Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Behavior of a widower, Widower syndrome, Stages of griefComment

YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU THINK YOU CANNOT!

How often have you said or thought, “I can’t do that! I am not good at it and never will be.”… After your wife passes, you may be faced with doing many things that you think you cannot do.

Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbySeptember 5, 2023Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Widower’s complicated grief, Widower syndrome, How to heal after a spouse diesComment

When Widows or Widowers Feel Like They Are Cheating – What Do You Do?

When your new widow girlfriend feels like she is cheating on her deceased husband, what do you do? Or maybe you are the one feeling like you are cheating on your dead wife. Are these feelings normal? How do you deal with this without blowing up your new relationship?…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Relationships, Widower Self Help, Widowers and datingFred ColbyApril 4, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Widower syndrome, Behavior of a widower, Grief therapy, Is a widower ready to date Comments

Widowers and Self-Punishment

In many cultures and religions, self-flagellation is accepted as an appropriate way to drive the demons, bad thoughts, and immoral behaviors out of oneself. Often, movies depict this with a person whipping themselves with a short whip or leather braids.

Now while we may not resort to this kind of physical purging, we often do participate in a form of self-flagellation which can be just as harmful and self-defeating…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyMarch 6, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorBehavior of a widower, Stages of grief, Coping with complicated grief, Widower syndrome Comments

7 Steps Before, During, and After Her Death

You had a romantic wedding, celebrated the birth of children, and got comfortable with your happily-ever-after life. Then tragedy struck and you realized how fragile the human body can be. Suddenly, you faced the prospect of seeing the source of your happily-ever-after life take her last breath…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyFebruary 5, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorHealing Grief, anticipatory grief, Widower syndrome, How to heal after a spouse dies, Stages of grief Comments

Surviving the Holidays

Everyone will start to tell you within a week of your wife’s passing that you must steel yourself against the trauma of upcoming special days and holidays. We each are likely to have very different experiences during these special days.

Widower, Widower Grief, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyNovember 13, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Blogs for widowers, widower loneliness, Widower syndromeComment

Imposters Syndrome – Overcoming Self-Doubts

Robin Williams, Richard Nixon, Oprah Winfrey, Ernest Hemingway, Vincent Van Gogh, Marilyn Monroe, John Steinbeck, George Washington, John F Kennedy, Abraham Lincoln, and many others struggled with their self-esteem and thought themselves imposters at some point during their lifetime.

As widowers, we often experience the same self-doubts.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyOctober 14, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Widower’s complicated grief, Widower syndrome, Widower helpComment

Widower: God, Football, Sex and Gold Diggers

Sex in particular can entice us away from those long-held beliefs which have served as our foundation for years. In the wrong hands, it can be used to blind us and turn us to less ethical or honorable practices.

Widower Relationships, Widower Self Help, Widowers and dating, Widower blogFred ColbyOctober 6, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower syndrome, widower loneliness, Widower and sex Comments

Do I Need Counseling, Therapy, or Coaching?

If you already have all the answers, don’t waste your time asking others for help… because you won’t be able to hear any advice that is offered, no matter how good it is. However, if you feel lost and are ready to hear what others can share with you, then by all means ask for help… and the sooner the better.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbySeptember 11, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower blogs, Widower syndrome, Coping with complicated grief, Men’s Grief Groups, Behavior of a widowerComment

Healing Through Empathy

Empathy is critical to healing grief. For me, it was second only to gratitude as a skill that I had to develop in order to pull myself out of the deep depression and suffering I experienced during the first year of my grieving. Many widowers find their ability to be empathetic to others is greatly enhanced after the loss of their wives.

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower support, Widower blogFred ColbyMarch 21, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower blogs, Widower syndrome, Behavior of a widower, How to heal after a spouse dies Comments

Grief Changes Us

Grief, really deep grief, can change you! I see examples of this change through my men’s grief group, responses to my online blogs, online widowers’ groups, and chance meetings I have with fellow widowers in my community. This change does not happen overnight, it can take months if not years to happen.

Widower Self Help, Widower Grief ExperienceFred ColbyFebruary 22, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower blogs, Widower syndrome, Widower Health, What is a widower experiencing?, Behavior of a widower Comments

Widower: Confronting Valentine Triggers and Reactions

Valentine’s Day, like birthdays and other special days, may bring back painful memories that set us back in our healing process. Knowing this in advance can help us to prepare so we can overcome their impacts…

Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower Grief ExperienceFred ColbyFebruary 7, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower blogs, Widower syndrome, Behavior of a widower Comments

Widower Wearing Wedding Ring Sparks Huge Discussion

Have you ever been the one to make everyone in the room suddenly freeze, their puzzled sights pointed in your direction after asking something that seemed completely okay at the time?

When a 32-year-old woman by the username u/Ideal-Mind3099 decided to ask her new colleague “James”, a recent widower, about the wedding band on his finger – things went into an opposite direction from what she expected….

Widower Relationships, Widower Self Help, Widower GriefFred ColbyJanuary 12, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower blogs, Widower syndrome, What is a widower experiencing? Comments

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