WHAT DID YOU LEARN?

Some of our best learning opportunities come from our worst experiences. I have had a few of those, and over time realized that I could learn something from each one….

You may have faced challenges like bankruptcy, losing your home, conflicts with loved ones, natural disasters, or a serious illness.

These experiences often come upon us suddenly and may seem insurmountable.

Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower Grief Experience, Widower blogFred ColbySeptember 15, 2025Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, How to heal after a spouse dies, overcoming widower isolationComment

TABOO WIDOWER TOPICS – Part 1

Most widowers, even the more extroverted of us, tend to shy away from discussing topics that seem too personal, too sensitive, or just plain uncomfortable. As men, we are trained to keep these things to ourselves. So we just don’t discuss them privately or in public. The negative effects of this are bad enough during normal times… but much worse when we become a self-isolated, lonely, grieving widower wallowing in our sorrow and thoughts at home…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyAugust 4, 2025Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Behavior of a widower, Suicidal thoughts, Coping with death of wife, How to heal after a spouse diesComment

LAUGHING AND HEALING WITH YOUR WIFE

One of the early signs that you might be pulling out of deep grieving and beginning to heal is the first time you laugh at a memory of your wife.

At first you may recoil at the fact that you are laughing at something she did, thinking you are betraying her and should suffer now and forever…

Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower Grief Experience, Widower GriefFred ColbyFebruary 17, 2025Fred Colby, AuthorWidower blogs, Coping with death of wife, healing grief, Grief therapy, How to heal after a spouse diesComment

YOU HAVE OPTIONS NOW! DO YOU WANT THEM?

When you first realize that you now have some unexpected options, you may not want them. They may scare you, embarrass you, or make you feel guilty.

Why? Because during the first few months of grieving the last thing you will want to think about are the choices that lie before you….

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower RelationshipsFred ColbyFebruary 3, 2025Fred Colby, AuthorCoping with death of wife, healing grief, Behavior of a widower, overcoming widower isolation, How to heal after a spouse dies, widower lonelinessComment

Is Religious or Secular Grief Counseling Best for You?

Shortly after my wife of 45 years passed in 2015, I found myself buried in grief. I knew I was in trouble and could not find the answers by myself. So, I asked, “Where can I go for help?” I knew a little about therapy but had never really taken advantage of it.

For many of us, choosing therapy may lead to having to make a choice: “Do I turn to a church for help? Or, do I turn to secular organizations for help?”

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyDecember 9, 2024Fred Colby, AuthorGrief therapy, healing grief, Coping with complicated grief, Men’s Grief Groups, How to heal after a spouse dies, widower lonelinessComment

YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU THINK YOU CANNOT!

How often have you said or thought, “I can’t do that! I am not good at it and never will be.”… After your wife passes, you may be faced with doing many things that you think you cannot do.

Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbySeptember 5, 2023Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Widower’s complicated grief, Widower syndrome, How to heal after a spouse diesComment

I Don’t Want to Heal!

Are you floating in a sea of grief with only a life vest of memories keeping you afloat? If you are not careful that life vest can become a diving weight belt of anger, regrets, and fear that drags you down into depression…

Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self Help, WidowerFred ColbyAugust 21, 2023Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Stages of grief, widower embracing grief, Grief therapy, How to heal after a spouse diesComment

Are You Talking to Others?

After the loss of our wives, many of us find ourselves unable to communicate effectively with others. Even those of us who come from careers in communication may find ourselves suddenly at a loss for words… Learning to communicate with others again is not only vital for us to heal but also critical if we want to re-engage with life again in any meaningful way.

Widower Relationships, Widower Grief, Widower blog, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJuly 10, 2023Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Behavior of a widower, overcoming widower isolation, Healing Grief, How to heal after a spouse dies, widower lonelinessComment

7 Steps Before, During, and After Her Death

You had a romantic wedding, celebrated the birth of children, and got comfortable with your happily-ever-after life. Then tragedy struck and you realized how fragile the human body can be. Suddenly, you faced the prospect of seeing the source of your happily-ever-after life take her last breath…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyFebruary 5, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorHealing Grief, anticipatory grief, Widower syndrome, How to heal after a spouse dies, Stages of grief Comments

Healing Through Empathy

Empathy is critical to healing grief. For me, it was second only to gratitude as a skill that I had to develop in order to pull myself out of the deep depression and suffering I experienced during the first year of my grieving. Many widowers find their ability to be empathetic to others is greatly enhanced after the loss of their wives.

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self Help, Widower Relationships, Widower support, Widower blogFred ColbyMarch 21, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower blogs, Widower syndrome, Behavior of a widower, How to heal after a spouse dies Comments

Widower: Rejecting false gods

Whether you believe in God, Allah, Yahweh, or a spiritual universe, you probably have heard the phrase, “Don’t bow down to false gods.” When we are grieving, many false gods may tempt us and drag us into a pit of despair…

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJuly 28, 2020Fred Colby, AuthorWidower’s syndrome, Widower Health, Blogs for widowers, How to heal after a spouse dies, widower loneliness, Widower Isolation Comments

Widower to Widower

Widower Grief ExperienceFred ColbyMarch 7, 2017Coping with complicated grief, Widower’s syndrome, How to heal after a spouse dies, Men’s Grief Groups, Widower blogs, widower books

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