YOU CAN’T PLEASE EVERYONE

We widowers often hear that soon after the death of our wives we will lose many friends and possibly some family ties. This frequently occurs despite our best efforts to maintain these previously reliable and important relationships. This can result in…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJanuary 9, 2024Fred Colby, AuthorDeath of Spouse, Coping with death of wife, Widower’s syndrome, How a widower can keep their relationshipsComment

WHAT DO GERVAIS, BACKMAN, HANKS AND GERRY TURNER HAVE IN COMMON?

There is an upsurge in interest in widowers and their grief journeys due to these four men who have brought open and frank discussions of the topic to the forefront. We believe this will help break down barriers for many widowers and those who love them…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self Help, Widowers and datingFred ColbyAugust 8, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorDeath of Spouse, Behavior of a widower, widower resources, Widower’s syndrome, Deep grieving, healing grief, Golden Bachelor, Gerry TurnerComment

You Can Heal Now!

If you want to heal to survive this hell-on-earth experience, you will have to grow as a person… as a father, brother, son, friend, and/or community member. If you retreat from the world to stew in your grief and anger, that is where you will likely remain…

Widower Grief Experience, Widower blog, Widower, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJune 16, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorHealing Grief, overcoming widower isolation, Death of Spouse, Men’s Grief Groups, Grief therapy, healing griefComment

I Was Supposed to Die First!

Almost every widower I have met, emailed, or spoken to has at some point said this to me. I certainly felt that way after my wife passed in 2015…This sense of feeling that “I should have died before she did” can lead to feelings of survivor’s guilt, as well as deep regret for not being able to “save” her.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyApril 19, 2023Fred Colby, AuthorHealing Grief, Behavior of a widower, Widower’s complicated grief, Widower’s syndrome, Death of Spouse, Survivor's guiltComment

Relationship Challenges When Your Wife is Dying

A year prior to my wife’s passing, she began to experience some upsetting physical conditions, including skin rashes and stress. This continued for a while with her unable to determine the cause or to find solutions after visiting a couple of doctors.

Around that time, she began criticizing almost anything that I did….

Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyDecember 12, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Death of Spouse, Behavior of a widower, Coping with complicated grief, Healing Grief, Grief therapyComment

Accepting Your Partner’s Faults

Many of us who lose a close loved one, tend to idealize them. This is carried to the max when the loved one was your wife of many years. All her faults, bad habits, odd behaviors that drove you nuts, and even those moments of disagreement seem to just disappear.

Widower, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbySeptember 23, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Behavior of a widower, Death of Spouse, Idealization of spouse Comments

Life After Death?

After our wife passes, many of us will ask the question we desperately want an answer to:

“Does she still exist? Is she still aware of me? Can she hear me or see me? Is there any way for me to communicate with her?”…

Widower Self Help, Widower, Widower blog, Widower Grief, Widower RelationshipsFred ColbyJanuary 23, 2022Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower’s syndrome, What is a widower experiencing?, Death of SpouseComment

WHAT TO SAY, NOT SAY, AND I SAY …. TO A NEW WIDOWER

I recently was asked during a radio interview to summarize my advice to the friends and family of a widower on what to say or not say to them. The following are some highlights of our conversation…

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyOctober 19, 2021Widower blogs, Widower’s syndrome, Death of Spouse, Widower Families Comments

Widower: Surviving Anticipatory Grief

If you experienced extended time as a caregiver for your wife, there is a good chance that you also experienced anticipatory grief. Expectation of imminent death can be both a blessing and a curse…..

Fred ColbyMay 23, 2020Fred Colby, AuthorWidower Health, Widower isolation, Healing Grief, Death of Spouse, Widower help Comments

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