SURVIVING SELF-ISOLATION

Just when we are most vulnerable, just when we need human contact the most, and just when everything in our body and mind are screaming at us to hunker down and hide from everyone… this is when we need human contact and support the most…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJuly 6, 2026Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Behavior of a widower, overcoming widower isolation, Death of Spouse, healing grief, How a widower can keep their relationships, widowers asking for help, Reinventing yourself, What is a widower experiencing?, Widower behavior Comments

WHY EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE IS CRITICAL

Widowers, you can’t think your way out of this one!

Usually our analytical brains put our IQ (abstract reasoning, memory, and problem-solving) to work to solve whatever new challenge we are facing. But when we lose our wives, these old standbys fail us. Instead we have to turn to our Emotional Intelligence (EQ) to make some sense out of our scary new reality… BUT, we often find our EQ is woefully inadequate because of years of neglect.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJune 22, 2026Fred Colby, AuthorAI and Therapy, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, Deep grieving, healing grief, Stages of grief, How to heal after a spouse dies, overcoming widower isolation, widower problemsComment

GO TO THE LIGHT!

When you are in a long dark tunnel, and trying to find your way out… do you continue down deeper into the darkness or do you go towards that pinpoint of light in the other direction?

So often when we are buried in grief we have trouble figuring out which way is good and which way is bad.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyJune 8, 2026Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Behavior of a widower, overcoming widower isolation, healing grief, Survivor's guiltComment

ARE YOU GREEN, YELLOW OR RED?

As men we often just charge ahead and apply whatever solution we think is right based upon our own limited experience… no matter unhelpful it may be. Other times we may take the advice of a poorly informed friend or relative and take actions that are the exact opposite of what we should be doing…

Widower Emotions, Widower blog, Widower, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self Help, Widower supportFred ColbyApril 27, 2026Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, Death of Spouse, Grief therapy, How to heal after a spouse dies, how to help a grieving widowerComment

LIVING IN THE PAST?

When we first enter deep grieving after losing our wives, we desperately try to hold on to her. This can include (as it did for me) going through all the old photos, slides, and mementos to try and keep her close. This leads us to continue living in the past, and not engaging in the present… or future.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyApril 13, 2026Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, depression, Bereavement, What is a widower experiencing?, widowers asking for helpComment

NEGATIVITY BIAS

When things are going badly, and certainly the death of your wife qualifies, it is easy to fall into a spiral of negativity. Whether you were inclined towards a negativity bias before or not, it is easy to think that:…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyMarch 30, 2026Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, healing grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, Grief therapy, Widower memories, widower problems Comments

REJECTING FALSE GODS!

Whether you believe in God, Allah, Yahweh, or a spiritual universe, you probably have heard the phrase, “Don’t bow down to false gods.” When we are grieving, many false gods may tempt us and drag us into a pit of despair which can be hard to climb out of…

BEFORE AND AFTER GRIEF COPING STRATEGIES

We are approaching Valentines Day which can often trigger even more pain, regret, and loneliness. Unfortunately, it follows our emotional roller coaster holidays. It’s like a grief train that won’t stop and let us off. What can we do to survive these and other grief inspired challenges?

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Emotions, Widower blog, Widower, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyFebruary 1, 2026Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, Widower scams, Men’s Grief Groups, Grief therapy, How to heal after a spouse dies, healing griefComment

WIDOWERS AS UNICORNS – HOW IT AFFECTS DATING

When you become a widower and begin to enter the dating scene, you may hear the term “unicorn” being bandied about by women you encounter during this period. I heard it often during the first couple of years after my wife passed.

Overall, this is a good thing!…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyDecember 8, 2025Fred Colby, Authordangers of dating for a widower, Changes to expect for widower, overcoming widower isolation, healing grief, Is a widower ready to date, Sex and WidowerComment

GRIEF + HOLIDAYS = MELTDOWNS?

I found myself in a predicament one Thanksgiving eight years ago. It surprised me. Suddenly my grief (which I thought was under control 1½ years after my wife’s death) re-emerged full force. I escaped to my master closet and sunk down to my knees as full-on sobbing took over. For maybe five minutes I just let it run its course, and then suddenly it was over…

Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Relationships, Widower Self Help, Widower blogFred ColbyNovember 24, 2025Fred Colby, AuthorWidower and the holidays, Stages of grief, Changes to expect for widower, Deep grieving, healing grief, overcoming widower isolation, Coping with death of wifeComment

BIG BOYS DO CRY!

Remember Frankie Valli’s hit song, “Big Girls Don’t Cry?” Many of us can probably sing a few verses. Well, like you, I learned the hard way that as widowers, BIG BOYS ALSO CRY! And we often find it to be a shock to our system.

Nothing can be more disconcerting for our sons and daughters than to see their father cry…

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower blog, Widower, Widower EmotionsFred ColbyOctober 13, 2025Fred Colby, AuthorBehavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, overcoming widower isolation, Healing Grief, Stages of grief, Blogs for widowers, How to repair broken relationships with a widower, Changes to expect for widower, widower problemsComment

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