LIVING IN THE PAST?

When we first enter deep grieving after losing our wives, we desperately try to hold on to her. This can include (as it did for me) going through all the old photos, slides, and mementos to try and keep her close. This leads us to continue living in the past, and not engaging in the present… or future.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyApril 13, 2026Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, depression, Bereavement, What is a widower experiencing?, widowers asking for helpComment

NEGATIVITY BIAS

When things are going badly, and certainly the death of your wife qualifies, it is easy to fall into a spiral of negativity. Whether you were inclined towards a negativity bias before or not, it is easy to think that:…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyMarch 30, 2026Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, healing grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, Grief therapy, Widower memories, widower problemsComment

REJECTING FALSE GODS!

Whether you believe in God, Allah, Yahweh, or a spiritual universe, you probably have heard the phrase, “Don’t bow down to false gods.” When we are grieving, many false gods may tempt us and drag us into a pit of despair which can be hard to climb out of…

BEFORE AND AFTER GRIEF COPING STRATEGIES

We are approaching Valentines Day which can often trigger even more pain, regret, and loneliness. Unfortunately, it follows our emotional roller coaster holidays. It’s like a grief train that won’t stop and let us off. What can we do to survive these and other grief inspired challenges?

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Emotions, Widower blog, Widower, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyFebruary 1, 2026Fred Colby, AuthorStages of grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, Widower scams, Men’s Grief Groups, Grief therapy, How to heal after a spouse dies, healing griefComment

WIDOWERS AS UNICORNS – HOW IT AFFECTS DATING

When you become a widower and begin to enter the dating scene, you may hear the term “unicorn” being bandied about by women you encounter during this period. I heard it often during the first couple of years after my wife passed.

Overall, this is a good thing!…

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyDecember 8, 2025Fred Colby, Authordangers of dating for a widower, Changes to expect for widower, overcoming widower isolation, healing grief, Is a widower ready to date, Sex and WidowerComment

GRIEF + HOLIDAYS = MELTDOWNS?

I found myself in a predicament one Thanksgiving eight years ago. It surprised me. Suddenly my grief (which I thought was under control 1½ years after my wife’s death) re-emerged full force. I escaped to my master closet and sunk down to my knees as full-on sobbing took over. For maybe five minutes I just let it run its course, and then suddenly it was over…

Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Relationships, Widower Self Help, Widower blogFred ColbyNovember 24, 2025Fred Colby, AuthorWidower and the holidays, Stages of grief, Changes to expect for widower, Deep grieving, healing grief, overcoming widower isolation, Coping with death of wifeComment

BIG BOYS DO CRY!

Remember Frankie Valli’s hit song, “Big Girls Don’t Cry?” Many of us can probably sing a few verses. Well, like you, I learned the hard way that as widowers, BIG BOYS ALSO CRY! And we often find it to be a shock to our system.

Nothing can be more disconcerting for our sons and daughters than to see their father cry…

Widower Grief Experience, Widower Relationships, Widower blog, Widower, Widower EmotionsFred ColbyOctober 13, 2025Fred Colby, AuthorBehavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, overcoming widower isolation, Healing Grief, Stages of grief, Blogs for widowers, How to repair broken relationships with a widower, Changes to expect for widower, widower problemsComment

Blogs

Addressing grief, loneliness, pain, relationships, fear, doubt, loss of control, and more. Drawing upon personal experience, research, lessons learned, and input from thousands of widowers since 2016. Helping fellow widowers through over 200,000 blogs read to date.