I SHOULD HAVE DIED FIRST!

Almost every widower I have met, emailed, or spoken to has at some point said, “I should have died first.” I certainly felt that way after my wife passed in 2015. We both had some health challenges during our lifetime, but mine were the more serious ones and the more recent ones; so, it was a big surprise for both of us when she was diagnosed with uterine cancer and became seriously ill over a one-year period before passing.

LIVING IN THE PAST?

When we first enter deep grieving after losing our wives, we desperately try to hold on to her. This can include (as it did for me) going through all the old photos, slides, and mementos to try and keep her close. This leads us to continue living in the past, and not engaging in the present… or future.

Widower, Widower blog, Widower Emotions, Widower Grief, Widower Grief Experience, Widower Self HelpFred ColbyApril 13, 2026Fred Colby, Authorhealing grief, Behavior of a widower, Coping with death of wife, depression, Bereavement, What is a widower experiencing?, widowers asking for helpComment

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